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Ha. That felt good. But I wanna scream some more. There's this feeling building up in me. Like...frustration and anger and confusion all at once. Its about so many things. I wish I could point fingers, but I have no one but myself to blame :/ No one else is helping either!!
This is so frustrating annoying mind boggling and ARGH. Aiyooooh today sum more :/ In its order from the least important. 1) N, you gotta find a way of dealing with this. QUIT TELLING MY FRIENDS STUFF ABOUT ME! I promise I will shut up about you, but you're not helping yourself, telling ppl stuff you shouldn't. If you like me, keep it to yourself. Don't tell my friends cuz it'll come to me and that doesnt help me like you any better! AAAH! I wish I could help you :/ I'll tell hamsa ut im not sure she'll listen. Good luck man.
2) ................................. AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I feel like stabbing myself.
3) Fear. And worry. You wouldnt believe how much....over...eww. Need. :S I am so shallow its unbelievable :S
4) I dont understand. I dont understand. I dont understand. I can't wait for stupid school to end. I wish I had somewhere else. Like like, FC before. -.- Or...football. I dont even do that anymore. School has become such a big part...it never really was. Ewwwwwww. :S Hehe, amma's so worried about me :P She's gonna send me for wtv class i want, she even volunteered to pay for Actors Studio, haha. :P
Recurring words used to describe me, dumb and useless, and moronic. O.o Am I really that daft? I dont even KNOW. Aiiii.....
OHHH Pmr, in three days. Ngeheheheh :P I'm pretty scared rite now....especially for BM. Essay and all... The rest, I'm pretty sure I'll do alrite :)
There's a Melaka trip...Hamsa payed for me. Not sure if I should go. Everytime I think about it, I get a sinking feeling like...nuh uh...you really DO NOT wanna go. I dunno whether to ignore that or what? :S See I'm thinking about goin to Melaka right now...and I still get that low feeling. See la. Mummy says okay to letting me go...but once she said that, she was like, 'do you really wanna go?' I didn't answer. And she's like "it doesnt matter about the money. If you don't want to go, you don't have to'. WELL.
So, here was yet another blog post dedicated to my deteoriating life. Full of shit. That's what K said. And yeah, as I read this stupid post again, I realise, I could've avoided all of this. -.- GRRRRRRR. I do get myself in these stuations I'm stuck in not to mention how I feel. WHAT DO I DO?
Darn...can't school end already?